Beautiful Boy
by dark-phile-slayin-angel
Summary: Songfic. Post Trust No 1. Mulder makes a covert visit home. These are his thoughts. Lyrics from John Lennon's "Beautiful Boy".


Little drabble that popped into my head during a viewing of "Mr. Peabody and Sherman" and listening to Jon Lennon's "Beautiful Boy" to the montage.

Takes place after Mulder's almost return off the train in "Trust No 1". He did make it home for it a little while.

If there's a story out there like this, I apologize if it seems like I ripped anyone off. I actually haven't read X-Files fanfic in years.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Close your eyes,<strong>_  
><em><strong>Have no fear,<strong>_  
><em><strong>The monsters gone,<strong>_  
><em><strong>He's on the run and your daddy's here,<strong>_

_**Beautiful,**_  
><em><strong>Beautiful, beautiful,<strong>_  
><em><strong>Beautiful Boy,<strong>_

He shouldn't be here. Not now. But he missed them so much. He had left to get information, and to keep them out of danger. He'd been close to coming home a couple of weeks ago, but his homecoming had become an ambush. As much as he didn't want to endanger his family, the son that he had almost thought that he'd never have, and the woman who had held his heart for so many years, he couldn't bear to stay away any longer. Despite all his beliefs, the concept of a soul mate is one that he intellectually scoffed at. Until a skeptical scientist had walked into his office, sent to derail his work. As corny as it sounded, she completed him. And his son, a miracle they had both wanted so badly but had almost given up on.

_**Before you go to sleep,**_  
><em><strong>Say a little prayer,<strong>_  
><em><strong>Every day in every way,<strong>_  
><em><strong>It's getting better and better,<strong>_

_**Beautiful,**_  
><em><strong>Beautiful, beautiful,<strong>_  
><em><strong>Beautiful Boy,<strong>_

He silently moved in the room to the crib. Much as he might want to see her, she couldn't know he was here, it would only increase the heartache when he left again. He placed his hands on the railing of the crib, steadying his resolve. His grip tightened, and he looked down at the sleeping child. He was so small, and his life was so fragile. The baby boy squirmed in his sleep, as if he feel the gaze of his father on him. It was clear in his memory the first time he had gotten to hold him. His heart beat rapidly in his chest, and the euphoria in that moment was indescribable.

Which made his decision to leave that much harder to make. He needed answers, they both did. It was the only way to keep them safe. To know there was someone after his son, his family, and not know how stop them filled him with dread. He reached down with one hand, near the baby's fingers, and felt his son grasp his index finger in his sleep, which brought a soft smile to his face. He silently reaffirmed the same vow he had made the last time he had held his son, to do whatever it takes to protect him and his mother.

_**Out on the ocean sailing away,**_  
><em><strong>I can hardly wait,<strong>_  
><em><strong>To see you to come of age,<strong>_  
><em><strong>But I guess we'll both,<strong>_  
><em><strong>Just have to be patient,<strong>_  
><em><strong>Yes it's a long way to go,<strong>_  
><em><strong>But in the meantime,<strong>_

_**Before you cross the street,**_  
><em><strong>Take my hand,<strong>_  
><em><strong>Life is just what happens to you,<strong>_  
><em><strong>While your busy making other plans<strong>_

It was his hope that he wouldn't be away for much longer, but considering how long him and his partner have worked to even come to the tip of the truth, he wasn't hopeful. There wasn't a guarantee that he would be home soon. He felt adrift in his search without his partner by his side urging him on, and at the same keeping him from going over the edge, but he hadn't found what he was looking for yet. He had already missed so many days of his son's life, and it hurt his heart how many. But as much as he wished he could pretend that they were safe, he knew that their best chance at living was to get a hold of the answers that had been kept from them for so long.

He lightly rubbed his thumb against the tiny fingers grasping his own, and felt silent tears gathering in the corners of his eyes. He leaned down and kissed his son on the forehead, and murmured, "Don't grow up too much while I'm gone, okay bud? And look after your mother, someone needs to keep her on her toes."

He withdrew from the room, taking a brief glimpse at the woman sleeping in the other room as he left. The pull was so great to wake her and draw her into his arms, to talk with her and her faith reaffirm his own. However, he knew that if he did that, leaving again would be that much more impossible. So he stole out into the night, leaving her and their son in her apartment as quietly as possible. Now, he had to return to his shadowed journey to seek out knowledge that could possibly save them all, especially his skeptical, intelligent beautiful partner and their darling son.

_**Beautiful,**_  
><em><strong>Beautiful, beautiful,<strong>_  
><em><strong>Beautiful Boy,<strong>_

Darling, Darling, Darling William


End file.
